Unfuck the World

I saw this shirt posted by Pitchfork from  Angel Olsen (a musician I’ve never listened to, but I know comes highly recommended). This paired with the recent news from London–the bombing, the vehicular homicide (among SO MANY other things, obviously)–brought a totaling body count to mind. Flesh heaped on flesh, red digits racking up, no time for a breath, blink and gone.

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Image via elevation.supply

Why is the world so fucked up? I mean, it’s not new. People have suffered at the hands of each other for centuries. Our whole history is made up of who won a war against who, who is memorialized for dying in it, and the nameless millions and billions and more who no one will ever know. Pride and greed top the obvious list for why our world is fucked up. Wherever there’s selfishness, there will be souls in its wake. It’s easy to point this out at a distance: Wall Street fiends, celebrity hacks, politicians and preachers–all often one in the same. We seethe at home, thinking that if they’d just WAKE UP or GET LOST, we’d all be better off. But it’s always boggled me how we wish for peace at large, yet within our own communities, we still foster discontent. In my mental wingback chair, I sigh and suppose… it’s because our primary needs of sorrow and neglect are erased by protective shields and barriers like anger and vindictiveness, which cause divide.

I’m not above any of this. I’m envious, I’m spiteful; I get sad, I get tired. And that’s part of being human. It’s impossible to eradicate all of it all of the time. There will always be something that gets under your skin, offends, pains, discourages. I don’t think the point is how to avoid reacting to any of that, I think what splits the difference is teasing forward that other part of yourself that says,”I want to try again,” or “let me understand,” not “fuck you” or “oh well.” Those are easy tropes. They can be funny while they are erase responsibility. But where is the emphasis on compassion?* Our collective culture doesn’t actively lift up language for healing. And I don’t mean that in altruistic ignorance. I mean the language that seeds what can happen when you choose to regenerate like a green plant instead of blistering under heated pride.

Pride isn’t the only cause for trouble in our world, but from where I can see in my little corner, and what I’ve had to deal with and encounter, a lot of the gratuitous fuck yous and self righteousness that feel good in the moment just perpetuate stand-offishness and aloofness could have been salved with the generosity of spirit. That thing that rings in the back of your mind and says, “We all bleed. This isn’t the hurt olympics. Help me.” Call me an idealist at heart (please do), but I do think that with each small step we take in our own lives to honestly account for our actions and feelings, the closer we will come to that embrace we all seek: hope.

*I read something somewhere once that was like, “The three hardest things to say in life are, ‘I love you. I’m sorry. Help me.’” I try not to waste my time wondering why it’s hard to say these things. I’m more interested in trying to open my mouth and say them.

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Updates

Wakey, wakey! We’ve got some new items of interest for you!

  • A new excursion down the rabbit hole with a two-part interview about the good and the not-so-good in ourselves.
  • Are you dream happy (think, trigger happy)? Our culture tells us relationships will make us happy, but that’s obviously not always true.
  • A review of the horror movie XX. It’s a unique and thought-provoking anthology that puts a new twist on what’s really scary.

 

Dream Happy

I often preach how I feel people seek romantic relationships for the wrong reasons. It’s not a new perspective to say that our culture approaches romantic relationships through lenses that don’t always show reality–Hollywood, fairy tales, and the ever-revered and elusive “American Dream.” The dream job, dream house, dream income, and dream relationship (eventually ending in a dream marriage).

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The understanding is that this dream will make us happy and that happiness is the only reason for us to do anything at all. It’s become a motivation, carrying over into our relationships. We look for someone who will make us “happy,” but happiness is such a vague and changing thing. It’s shallow.

Continue reading “Dream Happy”

All is full of love.

Whether you celebrate Valentine’s day, Galentine’s day, both or not at all, or don’t care one way or another, remember: love isn’t restricted to one day or one person and often comes in unexpected forms. 

 

“You’ll be given love. You’ll be taken care of, you have to trust it. Maybe not from the sources you have poured yours. Maybe not from the directions you are staring at… twist your head around. It’s all around you. All is full of love, all around you.”

Follow our Instagram today for reminders that love doesn’t have to be only about romance! Love crosses boundaries, encompasses friends and family, and most importantly, should be expressed in yourself!